Charlie Sheen Arrested for Crimes to Comedy

Charlie Sheen has been arrested in the Colorado resort town of Aspen on charges related to his extremely popular but comically dubious sitcom 'Two and a Half Men'.

Police spokeswoman Elissa Moore said Sheen was arrested on Friday on charges of over-acting, second-degree use of eyebrows both felonies, along with criminally poor timing, a misdemeanour.

Police say the 44-year-old actor will be held without bond until his first court appearance. The court was closed for Christmas, and no date for his appearance has been set.

Jail officials said they will hold on to Sheen for as long as possible, in order to halt the filming of another series.

Tiger Woods REALLY needs to improve his driving

Not only has the infamous late-night car crash put Tiger Woods in the rough, it has been revealed that Tiger is not his real name. He was orginally named Cheetah.

Hey Hey, I'm not racist but...

5 Indian Doctors and none of them are Taxi Drivers or Terrorists...?

Broken Hill moves to Rooty Hill

After more than a 1000 tonnes of red soil was blown from Broken Hill to Sydney on the East Coast the City is now in clean-up mode. In another shock there were reports of some 4WDs on the North Shore being covered in dust.

Rupert Grint has Swine Flu

Rupert Grint who plays Ron Weasely in the Harry Potter movies has been treated for Swine Flu contracted while working on the latest film.

Doctors also treated him for Hog Warts.

Miss California not fired, by Trump

An emotional Miss California Carrie Prejean kept her crown on Tuesday, and the beauty queen stood by her opposition to gay marriage and defended posing for topless photos. Speaking from California, Miss USA pageant owner Donald Trump said "I hope that beauty can once again triumph over politics, this is not Alaska"

NOW - News Of the Week - April 28

Ronnie Wood set to marry his 20-year-old Russian lover

The 61-year-old Rolling Stones guitarist – who sparked huge controversy last year after leaving his wife of 23 years to be with Ekaterina Ivanova – has told friends he has found “a new lease of life” since dating the waitress. Before he can marry Ekaterina, Ronnie must divorce estranged wife Jo and he is determined to protect his £60 million fortune. Ekaterina a furniture lover is set to get an Old Rocker - Wood.

Authorities monitor swine flu spread

Health authorities around the world are taking steps to prevent the spread of swine flu, which has killed more than 80 people in Mexico and infected others in the United States and Canada.
Although the origins of swine flu are unknown, authorities suspect Donald Rumsfield.

NOW - News Of the Week - April 25

Russell Crowe slams Peter Garrett

Russell Crowe, has used his appearance on Letterman to take a pot shot at Federal Environment Minister Peter Garrett over the fate of a wildlife reserve dedicated to the late Steve Irwin. Crowe went on to encourage viewers to "hit him up on the phone"

Dirty Domino's Duo, Caught and Fired

An online manhunt has led to the firing and arrest of two Domino's Pizza employees after they uploaded videos of themselves on the web fouling up customers' food.

Viewers, disgusted by the vile videos, managed to track down the employees, Kristy and Michael, to a Domino's store in North Carolina in the US.

They have been offered jobs at the Coogee Bay Hotel.

AFL players mortified that frozen chicken was male

FORMER Kangaroos captain Adam Simpson and senior player Daniel Pratt have admitted involvement in the production of an internet video depicting a condom-wearing rubber chicken performing sex acts. A chicken expert revealed today that the frozen chicken was actually male, a large rooster and the acts were done in a disturbing homo-erotic manner.

New 42 billion dollar national broadband network announced

Now Australia can censor the internet faster than any other country.

Brothel crash driver flees

The driver of a $175,000 Mercedes fled the scene after crashing into a brothel in Richmond on Sunday. Witnesses say he was not just crawling the curb, he leapt it and smashed into the building.

Politicians addicted to Chinese Junkets

Almost one in four federal MPs have accepted free overseas travel worth hundreds of thousands of dollars from foreign governments, private companies and lobby groups in just 16 months since the last election. These politicians are racking up more frequent flyer points than the Hells Angels on their way to a beat-down.

The end of Work Choices?

The Howard government's unpopular Work Choices legislation was buried by Labour last night. But questions arise as to whether it is really gone. Malcolm Turnbull is facing his own Work Choices as his popularity decreases in the polls and with his own party. Malcolm Turnbull is fighting to retain the unfair dismissal law.

Politician, pretending to be sorry for lying...except?

A web prankster impersonating Communications Minister Stephen Conroy on Twitter has been outed as a Telstra staff member. Leslie Nassar has been instructed not to talk to the media. Is this a case of a fake politician, not saying sorry for telling the truth?

Please Explain!

The former One Nation leader Pauline Hanson allegedly posed for amateur snaps sold to The Sunday Mail and Sunday Telegraph. In the photos, taken 30 years ago, she is posing semi-naked on a hotel bed. Australia as one nation has voted, saying "I don't like it!"

Coldplay and U2 bust-up

Chris Martin is not being drawn into comparisons with U2 or a verbal spat with Bono, who this week caused a stir when he jokingly called the Coldplay frontman a "wanker". This has the potential to see the two groups feud over who is the softest and most radio-friendly band in the world.

Principal finds 94 ecstasy tablets in 15-year-old's bag

A 15-year-old school boy has been charged with supplying drugs after nearly 100 ecstasy tablets were allegedly found in his school bag. The Principal called police saying he wasn't prepared to accept the boy's explanation that they were a stimulus package.

IKEA faces credit crunch job losses

Ikea has just announced a swathe of job cuts across all its stores world-wide. In what has to be the ultimate in DIY furniture acquisition, IKEA stores not only expect their customers to pick up and put together their furniture but to let themselves into the store as well. Ingmar Swensson the VP of Innovation at IKEA says customers can simply pick the store key up from under the mat.